A Little Cafe on The Coast

a little café on the coast
that's how I want to die
with a little café on the coast
and
with you
having traveled the world
with I

 

Sound Cloud

I wish I had never heard your songs

I wish I had never seen your smile

I wish moving on

was as easy as it's been for awhile

I'll never wish I never met you

But oh, its something close

I'll see you around town

I'll be with another girl

I'll be faking a smile

I wish I had never heard your songs

I wish I had never seen your smile

I wish moving on

Was as easy as it's been for awhile

where I don't let myself go

and when I was at my darkest you thought I was thinking about you

but really I was thinking about why I'm brown

from three cultures

and can't feel at home

not even with you

Shadows // Love

How did we grow up

losing our belief in love?

I know its hard,

but it exists,

as much as I do.

And on a dark day

I am not much

but I am still a shadow.

And shadows are real,

do you see yours staring at you?

My Corpse is Cold

I can’t write with any clarity

anymore.

My life’s a bore.

I’ve lost love.

It turned to lust,

and then to dust.

And now I sit and think about you

and how warm I was at night.

How cold it was during the day.

We were so apart.

Why did I let it start.

This path that led me to lose all my soul

for love and life.

And now I sit here, all work is strife.

You killed me dear.

You killed me dear.

I brought it on my self but you held the knife.

You held the knife.

Please love, let me wake up warm again.

Let me wake up warm again.

Solitude, Finally

I turned my loneliness into solitude

for such a time as this.

I turned my loneliness into solitude.

It’s beautiful madness this,

gazing at a fire I made on a beach,

and screaming into an empty abyss.

The horizon line is gone.

Night is home.

Let me roam,

let me roam.

I like to be alone.

idiosyncratic

Her idiosyncrasies meant the world to me.

I didn’t want anyone but she.

All the little things meant all of it to me.

All the little things brought me to my knees.

Come back home to me,

please,

with all your idiosyncrasies.

All the little things mean all of it to me. 

A Girl by the River, Deep in Yosemite

I saw her early in the morning,

riverside, so alive.

I was wide awake,

drinking the water in,

here in the forest, away from everything.

I told her,
“I know civilization is frail.

But I could go back to it with you.

I know civilization has failed,

but maybe, I can face it with you. "

Coward

She called me a coward and I agreed

And I kept kissing her

Until I couldn’t see my dishonesty

 

She called me a coward and I agreed

And we kept kissing

Every now and then

Just because I was lonely and she was free

 

She called me a coward and I couldn’t disagree

But I finally said goodbye

And I tried oh I tried to leave her be

But she had called me a coward and I couldn’t disagree.

I was so lonely and she was so free.

More Blessings Than Daniel

My blessings looks like

me stuck in a pit,

the hard dirt floor packed down

by the paw prints of lions.

They are all around me,

roaring and fighting,

they’re gashing each other,

and the largest one with blood on his fangs

turns and looks me in the eyes.

I watch him until I fall asleep

And then I awake from the night

warm from the breathe of lions

and the fur of manes.

My fears are all around me but they have not consumed me yet.

That’s what my blessings look like. 

Why Do I Feel So Asleep

I'm lying In bed screaming for the music to speak to me

But I can't find an honest track I can't find the soul

I can't hear any artist

Just writers

I can't hear any music

 just musicians 

I can't sleep I can't sleep

I used to be able to crawl

She had never seen something like me before.

I wish she had noticed my color.

The brightest snakes have the most poisonous venom.

Where I Keep Coming Back From

They left me stranded in the wild.

They didn’t know that’s where I’m from.

They left me stranded,

oh, they left me stranded at home.

Overhanging Branches

These trees hang over me.

These branches drip

until they touch

and remind me

of so much.

So much I’m running from.

But the brush is getting thicker

and soon I will be stuck

Dead Lukewarm Lovers

I do not want to go like most do. I want something a little more.  I want to die with love stuck in my head, heard deep in my ears, felt with my hands and alive in my walk. I do not know if I have the courage to do this, I may be destined to settle in the dust of the dead lukewarm lovers, the bags under eyes, sleepy hollow faces. Let me dip my pen into ink, and scrawl before I go…  

I keep trying to conquer this idea

I needed to get away

so much that I didn’t let it show that I was crazy

till I disappeared without a trace

off into the forest

where maybe God would give me grace